Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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