batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Randomize