Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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