oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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