So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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