As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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