She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
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