why didn't you poke me back
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
