Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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