I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
