So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
