i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
