similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
