thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Randomize
