i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
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