just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
