I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
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