I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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