he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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