omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Randomize
