My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
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