How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
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How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
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My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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