i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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