we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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