She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
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