hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
