we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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