thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
