their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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