I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
