Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.