were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
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