So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Randomize
