Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize