Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize