Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
