My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
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