I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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