I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
