Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Randomize
