Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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