he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
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I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
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We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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