i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
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