Texts From Last Night

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  (650): View more from California

  my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah

  (415): View more from California

  and she bought it?!?

  (650): View more from California

  yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes

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  (650): my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah (415): and she bought it?!? (650): yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes http://tfl.nu/zwxp
  Replies (28) Good night (8347) Bad night (802)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.

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  (585): Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked. http://tfl.nu/rhwl
  Replies (27) Good night (2690) Bad night (816)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words

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  (810): Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words http://tfl.nu/8a38
  Replies (9) Good night (3601) Bad night (1201)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  I miss the smell of you or some shit.

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  (408): I miss the smell of you or some shit. http://tfl.nu/h6lu
  Replies (23) Good night (3033) Bad night (1283)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.

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  (973): We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness. http://tfl.nu/5j3m
  Replies (17) Good night (2738) Bad night (1062)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.

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  (910): I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend. http://tfl.nu/txzp
  Replies (4) Good night (596) Bad night (1013)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents

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  (519): I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents http://tfl.nu/4hgt
  Replies (2) Good night (1404) Bad night (393)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.

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  (202): I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills. http://tfl.nu/w2hv
  Replies (6) Good night (1480) Bad night (683)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly

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  (716): I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly http://tfl.nu/23d8
  Replies (1) Good night (558) Bad night (1106)
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  (463): View more from

  I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.

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  (463): I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file. http://tfl.nu/era2
  Replies (8) Good night (716) Bad night (385)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.

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  (978): I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite. http://tfl.nu/sc9k
  Replies (1) Good night (930) Bad night (300)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?

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  (740): I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage? http://tfl.nu/ih0x
  Replies (6) Good night (676) Bad night (353)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.

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  (317): If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy. http://tfl.nu/4eke
  Replies (8) Good night (862) Bad night (526)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...

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  (306): so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night... http://tfl.nu/edce
  Replies (2) Good night (327) Bad night (549)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"

  (425): View more from Washington

  She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."

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  (425): You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs" (425): She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs." http://tfl.nu/hxs2
  Replies (0) Good night (860) Bad night (230)

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