I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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