Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize