You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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