I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
