He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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