white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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