You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
