4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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