Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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